


No Second Chances

by ConfessionForAnotherTime



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Oral Sex, Pining, gendered slurs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-10
Updated: 2015-05-10
Packaged: 2018-03-29 22:08:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3912379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConfessionForAnotherTime/pseuds/ConfessionForAnotherTime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Happy birthday V! She requested some modern AU Lolix where Felix is in love with Locus.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Second Chances

“Yeah, you like that don’t you?” Felix pressed his hands against Locus’ chest for leverage. “Hands to your sides. No touching. Tonight is about what I want.” Felix raked his fingers down Locus’ chest and grinned wide at the grimace on his face, squeezing around his cock as he thrusted up into him. Felix laid against him, still taking him at a rapid pace.

“Tonight, you may be inside me, but I’m fucking you. Tonight is about me,” Felix whispered against his lips, repeating himself, breath hot from the exertion of taking him fast and deep. “Tonight is about how I want you and what you’ll do for me.” Felix pressed his lips to Locus’ roughly, teeth nibbling and sucking on his tongue as he pushed his mouth open.

Felix yelped when Locus threw him off his lap, breaking the rhythm he had built while he rode him hard, thighs slapping together. Locus moved quickly, flipping Felix onto his stomach and gripped his hair, sliding back into his ass and continuing the fast pace that Felix had started.

“Told you before. No kissing.” Locus leaned down, pulled his hair back so his neck was taut and bit his shoulder. Felix couldn’t help but moan when Locus slid into him, thrusting hard and relentless. His eyes slipped closed while Locus fucked him, and he gave in. Usually, Locus just reacted to Felix during sex. This time, Locus thrusted up and rolled his hips, moving Felix along in a way that he hadn’t before. Felix delighted in the attention, biting his lip at how softly Locus moaned out his name. He never expected to moan out Locus’ name like the man cared about him, yet he never expected Locus to growl his name deep at the back of his throat just now like he was claiming a prize. The sound shot straight to his cock, making it jump from where it was trapped under him. Felix rubbed himself against the bedspread, Locus still thrusting into him quickly, knowing he wouldn’t last much longer at this rate.

As predicted, Locus pumped several more rough, hard thrusts into Felix’s ass. Locus’ hands, having long since abandoned his grip on Felix’s hair, roughly gripped his hips as his cock pulsed and he came inside him. Locus’ breath was hot on Felix’s back when he laid down on his back, panting, lifting his hips to pull out of him and roll off. Felix rolled his eyes, wincing as he turned over from the angle Locus had trapped his hips in when he pushed in his final thrusts.

“Really?” Felix looked down at his cock, still erect, almost painfully so. Locus shook his head as he tried to catch his breath first, then rolled over, taking Felix into his mouth and lavishing his tongue over the shaft. Felix used all his willpower not to thrust up into Locus’ mouth, not to push his head down like he usually did, not to push the boundaries of anything that Locus normally let him do after provoking him into taking action during sex. Still, the way Locus ran his tongue over his shaft and sucked on every sensitive piece part of him like he had been sucking his cock for years still made him push his hips up a little and desperately cling to the sheets as he moaned in wanton abandon. If there was a heaven, it was Locus’ mouth worshipping his cock.

“Oh god, yes. Right there Locus, the thing with your tongue---fuck,” Felix blurted out, pushing his hair back off of his forehead, unable to stop himself from thrusting up again. Locus swallowed him in, pulling off enough to focus his attentions on the sensitive tip. Locus worked his mouth over the head, twisting his tongue and pulling back the foreskin to drive as much sensation as he could out of Felix. He flattened out his tongue, kept the foreskin pulled back and took Felix into his mouth, stopping when the tip pressed against the back of his throat and swallowed around it. Felix couldn’t hold back the moan here, nor could he keep himself from thrusting up hard, trying to get more. Locus choked slightly, playing it off as well as he could as he pulled back, licked the drool off of his lips and went back to work, sucking and licking and nibbling. Felix’s orgasm pooled in his stomach, soon releasing himself down Locus’ throat like he had so many times before. Locus moved up to lay next to Felix as he panted his appreciation, flopping his hand over Locus’ stomach and rolled to cuddle up to his side.

Locus stared at the ceiling as he came down, ignoring Felix playing with the trail of hair down to his cock as well as the light touches around his hips. He refused to pay attention to the hand running over his dreads but the lips on his shoulder made him speak up.

“What did I tell you about kissing?” Locus moved to get up, pulling away from Felix to pull on his boxers. Felix frowned when Locus pulled on his pants as well, bending over to look for his shirt.

“You said no kissing after I kissed your lips. This is the only time you have ever protested it. Why the sudden change?” Felix had rolled to his side to watch Locus dress, still frowning.

“Just didn’t fit with the sex.” Locus pulled his shirt over his head and shrugged.

“You could have just said that instead of flipping me over and being all dominant. I did enjoy the finish though.” Felix winked in the dark room, though he was sure that Locus didn’t see it. “Same time tomorrow though?”

Locus nodded and reached for the door handle. “Same time tomorrow.”

“Unless you want to--” Felix didn’t get a chance to finish before Locus left the apartment. “Unless you want to come earlier and we could catch dinner. Maybe a movie. But no. You don’t want that. Why would we do anything that makes us look normal?” Felix sighed and pulled up his blanket. He reached for the remote and turned on the TV. He didn’t pay attention to what he was watching, just that it drowned out the sighs of dismay at the situation. Jaesan and Ginger jumped up and meowed. Locus leaving had let them back into the bedroom again. Felix pet them while frowning.

“I don’t know either, kitties.”

\---

“So what do you think?” Felix grabbed another bite of his sandwich, humming softly when it crunched from the potato chips he had put between the pastrami and provolone.

“I think for someone who you don’t call your boyfriend, you sure worry a lot about something that he gives no thought to. Had he mentioned no kissing before that?” Emily pushed up her glasses, taking another bite of her pasta.

“Not one word. It’s just confusing because he didn’t say anything about it before and we had kissed before that. He said anything I wanted went, so it just---” He groaned in frustration and threw his sandwich down. “It’s just fucking bullshit because I try and I try and he tells me no to fucking kissing, but then he swallows my cock like he owes me money.” Emily laughed behind her hand, grabbing another forkful of pasta. Their lunch dates were not usually this colorful.

“Well, have you tried talking to him about it? If you haven’t, that might be your first step instead of just complaining to me.” She shrugged, finishing off her lunch. She plucked one of the potato chips that Felix hadn’t shoved into his sandwich off of his plate and ate it. She grinned at his scowl and grabbed another before he pulled the plate away from her reach.

“I know. I know. It’s just easier to talk to you than it is to potentially fuck everything up with him. I mean, what happens if I say something and he decides no more sex? I’ll respect it, but I don’t want to lose him.” Felix left the last few bites of his sandwich on the plate, grabbing a couple of chips and even offering one to Emily from across the table. “Can you talk to him maybe?”

“Absolutely not. If you want to find a way to fix this, you’re going to have to do this yourself. Well, fix is a relative term. Nothing is really broken. You just want more than what he’s giving you because you loooove him.” Emily held her hands up to deflect the balled up napkin that he threw at her and giggled.

“Well, how does it work for you? I know you’ve had a boyfriend before even if you’re with Vanessa right now. How do guys work? Teach me, please,” Felix begged and reached for her hand from across the table.

“I know how guys work. I don’t know how guys like Locus work. I’m not even sure how to begin. He’s intimidating even if you’re in control. Really, if he decides you do something wrong, your little game is all over. I don’t even know what your game is.” She pulled her hand away to finish up the last of her lunch before taking his hand in hers again.

“See, that’s the thing. He’s fucking amazing in bed and his mouth is just---” Felix holds his hands apart after he pulls away from her and clenches his fists, closing his eyes. “Really, I wish you could experience his mouth.”

“Not my type and Nessa wouldn’t approve.” Emily snorted as she shook her head, admiring his enthusiasm.

“No no, I know. Okay. Whatever. Just listen. I just… I want to be with him, and it fucking sucks because I don’t think he wants me… or that or anything beyond sex. At least that’s what it feels like, ya know? Do you know what that’s like?” Felix resigned himself, pushing his plate out of the way, laying his head down on the table. Emily patted his head from across the table, frowning.

“Well, I know you’re worried about losing him and I know the sex is a great motivator to stay together, but your happiness is also important. This just isn’t about getting off though. This is about the fact that you’re agonizing about this so much that you’re miserable. I can see it in your eyes. I can see it behind the mohawk that you didn’t spike up today. You’re a mess Felix, and it’s because you’re waiting for him to love you when you’re not even sure if he wants to.” Emily nodded at the waitress when she set the check down on the table, handing her a debit card while Felix kept his head down. “I know you want him to love you, but you also need to be honest with yourself about what you want for you. If you can’t do that, you won’t be happy with him even if you aren’t in a relationship, now that this has popped up. I’m not saying you have to do anything, but talking to him is the first step to this not hurting as much. Maybe he’s just scared.” She ran her hand through his hair, scritching his scalp. He leaned into her touch and almost purred low in his throat. Grey shook her head. “Just one more thing to add to the list of reasons I think you were a cat in one of your many lives.”

“I was never a cat.” Felix rolled his eyes. “I don’t understand where you get this notion that I used to be a cat.”

“Well, you’re lazy. You would prefer to lay around all day instead of actually going to your job and making money to pay for your apartment. You eat more than a family of four. You approve of any kind of physical contact.” She winked as she ticked that one off on her fingers.

“Don’t you dare count spanking in that.” He huffed, puffing out his cheeks.

“You just fucking _purred._ I think I rest my case.” Emily shook her head and stuck her tongue out at him in response to his tongue poking out at her, past the point where his piercing could be seen.

“Doesn’t make me a cat though!” Felix flipped his hair out of his eyes.

“Well, fine, you’re a self-indulgent prick like most cats are.” Emily made a heart with her fingers at him, earning her a middle finger.

“Thank you. At least you acknowledge my good qualities.” Felix smiled at the waitress brought Emily back her card. “Same time in a few days? I guess I’ll talk to him tomorrow.”

“It’s a date.”

\---

“You’re still coming over tonight right? I need you. I’ve needed you since you left the other night.” Felix sprawled out on his bed and stared at the ceiling.

“You sound desperate. What’s so special about me that you can’t get from your hand?” Locus’ breath was rough from fatigue. His job at the bank had been more hectic lately and it showed in his voice. Felix pulled the phone away from his ear to scowl at it.

“I want you here at eight tonight. You’re going to fuck me and it’s going to be magical. You have an hour.” Felix did his best not to grit his teeth as he spoke, but he knew that Locus wouldn’t be able to back down from an order like that.

“Yes, Sir. Just let me shower. Have you eaten?” Felix could hear Locus shuffling with something on the other end of the line, but couldn’t make out what it was.

“Just did. Don’t bring anything unless you want to. Oh, come plugged too. I wanna ride you with that in because the noises you make are just---” Felix sat there shocked by the interruption.

“Stop. You don’t need to describe it. I’ll be there at eight.” Locus hung up quickly, leaving Felix to stare at the ceiling some more. Locus kept acting different. First stopping him from kissing, now interrupting him when he went to describe sexy plans. Neither was out of the ordinary, yet here he was, being shut down for continuing their beneficial sexiness between friends. Maybe Locus caught on to the fact that he viewed him as more than a friend now, though that had been changing over months. The lingering touches after they fucked. The short kisses in the middle of sex. Trying to hold his hand when they were out to lunch. Hell, even the lunch dates hadn’t happened in almost a month and Felix just now put together this likely stopped because Locus had caught on, but not enough to stop having sex with him.

“What are you getting at Locus?” Felix asked no one. Jaesan mewed quietly in response and Felix beckoned the cat to come to him, his sleek black fur soft under his fingertips. The cat flopped next to him, purring loudly at the simple attentions. Ginger perked up when she heard Felix call for Jaesan, her fluffy orange tail twitching as she jumped up and bounced erratically around the bed, cuddling herself around Felix’s neck. He idly cuddled the two cats, thinking over his situation. He knew he had to make a decision about something and Emily had only made everything that much more obvious to him. He needed to talk to Locus, that much was true. Ginger licked his cheek when he huffed out his annoyance, causing him to roll away from her, almost squishing Jaesan in the process. Felix rose from his bed, the two cats getting up to follow him. He knew he would need to feed them to distract them when Locus came over.

The moment he opened the can of wet food was the moment Locus knocked. Jaesan and Ginger eagerly mewed and walked in circles between his legs, not moving as soon as the food was put down and the door opened. Felix opened the door, greeting Locus and taking the sack of drinks Locus offered him in the doorway. When he turned back around, Locus’ mouth was on his, pushing him back against the counter in the kitchen. Felix registered that Locus had closed the door at some point, but his lips, soft and smooch against his, were kissing him. Felix pulled back.

“But you said---” Felix didn’t finish what he was saying thanks to Locus kissing him again. Locus pushed him firmer against the counter, lifting Felix’s thighs to have him sit and wrap his legs around Locus’ waist. Felix dared not complain, lest this dream stop and he have to rub one out before Locus got there. Locus circled Felix’s around around his neck, then gripped his thighs.

“Hold tight,” Locus told him between kisses, lifting his smaller frame off the counter and carrying him to Felix’s bedroom. Locus shut the cats out, just as planned. Locus laid Felix out on the bed, crawling over him to kiss him again.

“What happened to listening to my orders?” Felix asked once the kiss broke, trying to catch his breath. He hadn’t been kissed like that in a long time and not at all by Locus ever so the display had caught him off guard. He clicked his tongue ring against his teeth, more than a little turned on by Locus taking force in this way. He still wanted to ride him and dominate him for all he was worth, but this… this was different. This felt like Locus wanted him in the same way. Felix shook his head, dismissing the thoughts as Locus laid next to him, shifting from the plug in his ass rubbing against his sensitive flesh.

“Oh, I am. I am plugged up. You just sounded needy and this usually shuts you up when you need me that badly.” Locus flashed him a grin, making Felix suspicious. What was up with him? Felix quirked an eyebrow as he rolled onto Locus’ lap, relishing in the moan that he drew out of him from pushing the plug deeper into him.

“Oh, you like that huh?” Felix grinned widely now, pushing away the previous sweetness, proving it easier to ignore than he thought. It was a fluke. It meant nothing. Don’t read into it, Felix. Felix ran his hands up under Locus’ shirt, teasing his skin and tracing the muscles as he pushed up his shirt. Locus arched his back into the contact, shifting the plug, causing him to moan again.

“You are a fucking nightmare,” Locus growled out, keeping his hands down and desperately trying to control all of the sensations that the plug was forcing him to feel with the added weight of Felix on his lap.

“Here’s hoping you don’t wake up right away.” Felix slid off his lap, kneeling between his legs. He unbuckled his belt, peeked beneath the waistband and slid off his pants along with his boxers. Felix licked his lips at Locus being half hard already, intent on making his cock stiff and rigid. Felix edged himself down the bed, staying between Locus’ legs, and licked his way up Locus’ thighs. The man beneath him trembled, more in anticipation than anything.

Felix bent himself over Locus’ cock, taking Locus’ shaft into his mouth. He bobbed his head a bit, licking the underside and flicking his tongue over the head. Locus moaned when Felix took him back into his mouth, gripping at the sheets. He panted, barely able to control himself with the way that Felix was almost mimicking the motions he had used the other day. Locus sat up on his elbows, eyes slipping shut. Locus shifted on the plug, groaning.

“Are you just doing what I did?” Locus’ opened his eyes halfway when Felix engulfed him again, taking him deep into his throat and holding him there. Locus couldn’t contain the love he had for Felix’s lack of gag reflex and thrusted up into his moist heat, slipping just a bit deeper into him. Felix murmured around the shaft, pulling off and licking his lips.

“Adding my own flare to it. You can’t swallow my cock without choking.” Felix flashed another grin as he went back down. Locus tangled his hand in Felix’s hair, threading it through his mohawk.

“Well, there’s a reason for that.” Locus’ words rumbled low in his throat as he caught a quizzical look from Felix who pulled back off again, decidedly finished getting him hard and wet. Felix unbuttoned his shorts, shedding them off along with his boxers. Felix kicked off his sandals, leaving his socks on because he didn’t have the time after he pulled off his shirt and flung it across the room. Felix tapped on Locus’ thighs to have him move back on the bed, quickly lubing up Locus’ cock and straddling his lap. Locus let out another low moan as Felix’s weight pushed the plug deeper into him. Felix wasted no time, quickly lining up the tip of Locus’ shaft with his entrance, slowly sinking down on it until he was seated on him fully. He wanted this now, so he willed himself to relax and take him in without any preparation. The both of them groaned, differently pitched and Locus’ hands settled on Felix’s hips as Locus flexed his thighs to bounce Felix up a little bit on Locus’ cock. Felix pressed a hand against Locus’ chest to try and keep him from moving too fast, still adjusting to the girth buried deep in his ass.

“Come on, you can take movement this quick. You have before,” Locus goaded, still bouncing him slightly. Locus couldn’t help but bite his lip at the plug shifting inside him with each flex of his thighs to move Felix on his lap. Felix closed his eyes and let out a soft moan, giving in to Locus’ shallow thrusts into him.

“I know I can.” Felix stuck out his tongue, only opening one eye. “Doesn’t mean I want to just yet. Last time, I was sore for days.”

“Last time, you moaned like the sexiest piece of ass I’ve ever fucked,” Locus purred out, leaning up to pepper a few kisses to Felix’s collar bones, resisting the urge to thrust up into him. Felix opened both of his eyes this time, rolling them at  Locus. Felix lifted his hips, almost coming completely off Locus’ shaft. Felix focused on his own movements instead of the string of moans that escaped Locus’ throat with each thrust downward, shifting and pushing on the plug inside Locus. The two of them continued like that, skin moving against skin. Felix held tight to Locus’ shoulders, angling himself down against and again to take Locus’ length fully into him. Locus groaned low in his throat, pulling Felix against him and whispering into his ear.

“Yeah, fuck me like the whore you are.”

Felix stopped immediately, Locus still buried deep.

“The fuck did you just say to me?” Felix lifted his hips, shifting slightly so Locus could slip out of him and sat back a bit on Locus’ thighs.

“You’re always the one wanting to make the sex more interesting. I called you a whore. Big deal. I’ve called you a whore before.” Locus face spelled out the exchange wasn’t a big deal to him and Felix was making a huge fuss over nothing.

“No, you’ve called me a slut before and usually your slut. You’ve been weird lately.” Felix slid further back on Locus’ legs, not at all liking where the conversation was going.

“Slut, whore, what’s the difference? You still get my dick hard so why does it matter what I call you?” Locus shrugged at Felix as he got up from his lap, picking up Locus’ pants and throwing them onto his lap.

“What matters is that you don’t seem to care about me beyond sex.” Felix grabbed his pair of boxers off the floor, refusing to look at Locus.

“But that’s what this is. It’s sex. We are friends who have sex. Did you think it was something more than that?” Locus grabbed a towel off the floor that Felix had discarded previously, cleaning off the lube and pulling his boxers on that Felix had failed to throw at him when he tossed over his pants.

“You’re going to think I’m stupid…”

“If you thought this was more than sex, then yeah, a little bit. We set that up at the beginning.” Locus pulled his pants on, clasping the button, eyes on Felix’s back.

“I’m not stupid though! I can’t control how my feelings develop!” Felix spun around, fire in his eyes.

“You’re stupid for thinking this would be anything more than sex. What were you hoping to get? Love? That’s not how this started and it isn’t how it’s going to end.” Locus stood there, hands in his pockets, waiting for Felix’s retort.

“I don’t… why though? Why should we keep bothering to do this then if you can’t… no, won’t, love me? It may not be what we set out to do, but you have to admit that we’ve become closer.” Felix clung to the hope that Locus would agree. He stretched his arms over his head as he put on his shirt.

“The only closer we became happened when I was inside you. Besides, who loves a whore?” Locus stared at Felix for a few moments.

“Get the fuck out of my apartment.” Felix pointed to the door, glaring at Locus. “Get the fuck out. Now.” Locus shrugged but complied, opening the door to the bedroom and quickly crossing the living room to head out the front door. Felix hurried after him to ensure he left. “Have fun going home with that plug still up your ass! It goes great with the stick!” The door slammed behind Locus, leaving Felix in the living room. Jaesan stared at the door while Ginger curled back up on the couch. Felix clenched his fists. How dare he say something like that? How dare he even think? Felix breathed deep, and the anger overcame him again. Felix picked up a nearby bowl and hurled it against the wall, shattering it. Ginger tensed on the couch, claws digging into the fabric as Jaesan ran for the bedroom. Felix let out a sigh, the anger dissipated. He resigned himself to grabbing the broom, sweeping up the pieces of broken ceramic from the hardwood floor. Jaesan cautiously edged his way back out of the bedroom, hopping up onto the couch to cuddle with Ginger again like he had been before. Felix tossed the broken pieces into the trash, along with his heart. He threw the broom and dustpan onto the ground, not bothering to put them away and went to grab for his phone.

“Hey, Emily, can you come over? I need to talk to you.”

\---

“He said _what_?” Emily dug into the pint of ice cream she had brought over for herself, handing one to Felix followed by a spoon.

“He called me a whore. He basically said this was just sex to him and beyond being his friend I had no worth other than helping him cum. Not in so many words because Locus doesn’t really know how to properly communicate. I mean, if he had said ‘hey I like things the way they are with us just having sex’ and left it at that? I would have been way more okay with it. But as it is?” Felix looked down into his pint of ice cream, frowning when it didn’t have the little chocolate fish in it like previous bites did. “I just. I’m pissed. I don’t know what to do. Do I go back to him because I’m desperate and he’s a good lay? What do I do here, Em?” She shrugged for the moment, putting the lid back on her ice cream and reaching for Felix’s. He handed it to her and she returned them to the freezer, moving back to cuddle up in his bed next to him. She turned down the volume on the TV and pulled him close to run her fingers through his hair.

“Sweetie, there’s no right answer here. You have to do what’s best for you. If you want him back because being around him makes you happy for whatever fucked up reason, then by all means, call him up, tell him to come over and fuck you stupid. Tell him to fuck off. If he has any kind of common sense, he’ll realize what he lost even as a fuck buddy and come crawling back.” She leaned forward to kiss his forehead, smiling softly. “Besides, you’re a fine piece of ass. Someone will come snatch you up if he won’t.”

“But I don’t _want_ someone else. I want him. I wholly and desperately want him and everything it means to be wanted by him.” Felix’s voice got quiet. “He’s the one I think about before I go to sleep. At least now I know I’m not the one he thinks about before bed.” Emily pulled him close, hugging him tight.

“Sweetie, don’t fret. It will turn out alright. Promise. Here, take a nap. I already called you out sick for work so today is you and me. Sleep a bit first though. It’ll help clear your head.” Emily kissed his forehead again and he nodded, wrapping his arms around her to fall asleep against her chest. She practically cheered when she found the remote was still within each, switching to the cooking channel. Felix has fallen asleep pretty quickly, exhausted from the mental taxation. Emily heard a message ping in for Felix on his phone and upon closer inspection, found it to be Locus. _I made a mistake._ She dared not answer it, but flipped the device over so that she wouldn’t be tempted to look at other messages that popped up on the screen.

Emily continued to stay for several days, ensuring that Felix was cared for in as many ways as she could care for him when she wasn’t at work herself. He enjoyed her company and she enjoyed the animals when he was at work. Each message that came in from Locus was promptly looked at and left unresponded, allowing Locus to see it had been read and ignored. The messages became more frequent after the first few days, and Felix refused to answer any of them.

Locus knocked on the door of Felix’s apartment when he knew Felix was at work, intent on talking to Emily about what could be done. She spied him through the peephole, keeping the door latched and locked.

“What do you want?” Emily asked through the door, noting his frustration at her not facing him.

“I know Felix isn’t home. I’m here to talk to you. Gain some perspective since clearly I don’t have any on this situation at all.” Locus shifted uncomfortably outside the door.

“That’s the understatement of the year.” She continued to stare at him from the other side of the door. “I still don’t see how talking to me will help when you need to talk to _him._ ”

“Please just let me in. This is degrading.” Locus looked around the hallway, certain one of the neighbors was going to hear.

“Degrading like calling the guy who cares about you a whore?” Emily’s tone grew cold, but she opened the door anyway. “You have twenty minutes.”

“More than enough time.” Locus came inside, moving to sit on the couch to the left of the chair that Emily sat in.

“So. Talk. What’s so important that you have to talk to me about as opposed to the person you hurt?” She crossed her legs and folded her arms, ensuring he knew that she wasn’t here to beat around the bush about anything.

“I didn’t know though…” Locus starts before hanging his head. “That isn’t going to work, is it?”

“Not at all.” Emily shakes her head. “I don’t want bullshit excuses as to why you hurt him. I want to know when and if you plan to fix this mess. I mean really Locus, calling him a whore? What the fuck did you think was going to happen?”

Locus sat there for a few minutes, trying to come up with anything that wasn’t a lie or an excuse. He thought long and hard about why he had been there, why he had allowed it, why he kept coming back. The past few days had been miserable without him. There was no denying that. However, it was different than the times when he just wouldn’t come over for a few days. Felix ordering him out had hit him in a way that he hadn’t felt previously.

“I didn’t think he would kick me out.” Locus shrugged. “He doesn’t answer my texts at all, Emily. Normally he doesn’t go five minutes without responding. I know he sees them. I just.” Locus clammed up.

“He doesn’t answer them because you reduced what he felt about you to being just sex for you. It’s not just sex, is it? Not if you’re coming here to ask _me_ how to get him back. Or am I misinterpreting what you are trying to accomplish by coming here?”

“You aren’t. I just wasn’t ready to admit to myself that he got to me.” Locus offered a weak smile that quickly faded when he met her frown.

“So because _you_ were scared of admitting any level of feelings for him, you insult him, grind his feelings into dust and provoke him into hating you.” Emily claps sarcastically. “You would be lucky if he took you back at all. He shouldn’t, but this isn’t up to me, now is it?”

“I fucked up.”

“Understatement of the year. So what do you plan to do about it?”

“I don’t know.” Locus shrugged weakly.

“Well, figure it out. Your twenty minutes are over.”

\---

More than a week passed from the time that Emily spoke with Locus and Felix spent more of his time than he did before staying at home between work shifts, petting the cats and watching TV. Jaesan and Ginger enjoyed him being home more, but they could sense his unease since he had last seen Locus. Felix continued to dodge Locus’ messages. He would find other exits to his job at the grocery store to dodge seeing Locus in the parking lot, since the man couldn’t be bothered to come inside and talk to him. Felix started parking in different spots so Locus wouldn’t even know he was there in the first place. Yet, when he was at home, he couldn’t dodge the knock on his door, or the man on the other side. Emily had long since left, having gone back to her apartment earlier in the week when Felix convinced her that he would call if he needed her for anything. She had kissed his forehead and cupped his cheeks, assuring him she would come over again if he needed her. ‘Nessa understands’ she reminded him as she left.

Felix turned up the TV once he heard a knock at the door, followed by his phone going off with a text message.

[Can I talk to you?] Felix read the message and put his phone down, focusing his attention on Jaesan. He wasn’t going to give into him, not when he was nothing more than a piece of meat. Felix bristled when he heard the second knock, and a few minutes later when he heard a third.

“I’m not letting you in!” Felix called to the door, certain that Locus barely heard his muffled call. Another message came in.

[I’m not saying you should take me back, but I wanted to say I’m sorry.]

Felix scoffed at the message and threw his phone to the other side of the couch. He mulled over the idea of letting him in, but all he would be able to hear any time Locus spoke would be the last words he said to him. Felix took a deep breath after a few minutes, grabbed each of the cats and put them in the bathroom and shut the door. Ginger had stared at him in confusion as Jaesan curled up in the sink. Felix turned and opened the front door.

“You have a minute.” Felix scowled at him, not wanting Locus to see how his heart was still breaking on the inside. Locus didn’t look much better. “Jesus, have you even slept in the last two weeks?”

“Jesus, what is with you and Emily and time limits?” Locus made no move to even come inside, but instead, prepared to explain himself. Felix made a face, wondering when Locus had spoken to Emily, but shook it off. He would ask her later. “I’m a dick. I have no excuse for what I said to you. I just want you to know it was not my intent to hurt you at all. I was scared and I lashed out. I’m sorry.”

“What the fuck did you have to be scared of? You weren’t the one putting your feelings on the line?” Felix spat out.

“I was scared that you would think I was weak for mentioning if I had feelings for you. Honestly, none of them really surfaced until after you threw me out for being a dick. Based on how you’re handling the text messages and dodging me while you’re at work, I would understand if you never wanted to see me again.” Locus pursed his lips together after quickly wetting them. “I figured with how enthusiastic you were with the sex, that it was just sex, so that’s what I convinced myself what it was for months. Just sex.”

“I’m not even sure how I’m supposed to process that as an apology. You fucking suck at this. You have fifteen seconds.” Felix tapped his foot and started to close the door a bit when Locus came toward him. Felix froze for a second, afraid with how abrasive he had been. Locus’ hands smoothed over his cheeks as Locus took two steps forward, covering Felix’s lips with his own. It was a long shot but it was something for the last ten seconds that Felix would tolerate to be around him. The kiss was sweet and tender with Locus’ tongue softly swiping over Felix’s lips as he cupped Felix’s cheeks. Felix melted a little at how soft it was, how it was everything he could have wanted from Locus two weeks ago. Locus broke the kiss, fingers pulling away from Felix’s face. Locus took a step back.

“Just in case you decide that you want to let me go for good, I have something to remember you by.” Locus watched Felix’s expression, frozen in stunned silence. “Though, for something to shut you up…”

“Shut up. Just shut the fuck up. You insulted me. Okay yeah, we started as sex, but for you to call me a whore and belittle me like that. That I am not okay with at all. I don’t do second chances and you know that. However, I never found out your side before I assumed everything. I’m not taking the blame for this though. That’s all on you.” Felix finally found his voice, unclenching his fists. Locus started to turn and walk away, sure that Felix was telling him to fuck off again. “You hurt me though. You hurt me and that is going to take a long time for that to heal if you want to try and fix this and _not_ be an ass this time.” Locus stopped, turning back.

“You said you don’t do second chances.”

“I also said you never really got a chance in the first place.”

Locus turned back around rushing over to Felix, kissing him against and again. Felix smiled wide, pushing Locus back.

“Just, don’t fuck it up.”

 


End file.
